Percy, Everyone's Out To Date You
by Park Ninnie
Summary: Everyone wants a piece of Percy but he decides he wants someone else.


Percy and Nina were just walking out of the Great Hall after dinner, talking to each other about what had happened earlier that day. They ran into Marcus Flint and Draco Malfoy just outside of the two thick wooden doors of the Great Hall. _What the bloody fuck do they want?_ Percy wondered. _Your arse Perce._ Nina replied. Percy then remembered he and Nina had cast a spell that would allow them to communicate with each other through thoughts. He refrained himself from blushing and looked at the two Slytherin's.

"What is it?" He snapped at them. _What the bloody hell are you going on about?_ He snapped at Nina.

"Are you Scottish 'cause I got a bagpipe you can play with. Blow into it and I'll play you a song." Draco flirted and twisted a lock of his short blond hair around his finger. Nina's lips twitched at the corners and her laughter filled Percy's head. _Your arse Perce, your arse. They want it~!_ Nina sing-songed after her laughter had died down.

"Are you an ocean? 'Cause I can sea you gettin' wet." Marcus flirted, his eyes hungrily trailing up and down Percy's slim form. Nina burst out laughing at that. She fell against Percy's side, hiding her face against his shoulder as she sniggered. He glared at the two Slytherin's.

"Are you saying I'm huge? Getting motor boats all over me and smelling like fish?" Percy asked. He put on an upset expression and pulled Nina off in the direction of Gryffindor Tower, leaving the two Slytherin's wide-eyed and sputtering to reply. _Oh Merlin._ Nina sniggered. _Flint said he can "Sea you gettin' wet." Merlin that is hilarious!_

Percy playfully pouted and nudged Nina after she stopped sniggering into his shoulder._ That was not funny! I am not huge nor vast! Motor boats do not roam over my body and I certainly do not smell like fish!_ He argued.

_Flint and Malfoy certainly wanted to get there motor boats **inside** you._ Percy let out an undignified squawk and looked at Nina with wide horror filled eyes. She waggled her eyebrows at him and smirked. His infamous Weasley blush made it's way onto his cheeks and the tips of his ears, burning red.

_You are lucky you are my best friend else I would've hexed your bollocks into next year's sorting._ Percy nudged her side. He suddenly yelped and gripped Nina's hand as a shadow randomly submerged from around the corner. Nina smiled and gestured to the shadow who turned out to be Oliver Wood. Percy released Nina's hand and gave a hard glare at Oliver who just smiled kindly.

"Hey Ollie," greeted Nina. Oliver greeted her back before turning to look at me.

"Percy are you retarded?" He asked. Percy huffed while Nina's eyes widened and her lips twitched. " 'Cause you're pretty special to me."

"That is very rude of you Wood." Percy said in a harsh tone.

"Are you a cow Percy? 'Cause you got me utterly amazed."

"Oh dear Merlin!" Nina said before breaking into a fit of giggles and sniggering._ Perce, everyone's out to date you._ Percy ignored the thought from Nina and pulled her up to the staircases leading to the Gryffindor common room.

_No one is out to date me!_ He thought stubbornly as the staircases moved around.

_What was that back then with Ollie, Flint, and Malfoy then?_ Nina intruded on his denial thoughts.

_It's all just for a laugh!_

_I certainly was laughing. But seriously Perce have you ever considered that people want you even with that stick up your arse?_

_Oh sod off!_

"Percy~!" Chorused two familiar voices. Percy and Nina turned around to see his younger brothers. Percy noticed that the two were out and it was almost curfew. He and Nina had an excuse since he was Head Boy and she was a prefect. They didn't have to patrol tonight but they could use that as an excuse. He turned to the twins, his hands on his hips in reminiscent of their mother when she was angry or ready to tell the bollocks off of each of her children.

"What are you two doing out?" Percy said in a tone mixed of Head Boy and mother. It put a smile on the twins faces. They walked all the way up the steps so that they were just a step away from Percy. Percy found it a bit uncomfortable and straightened his back, crossing his arms. He waited for their answer.

"You know those muggle televisions and stuff?" asked Fred. Percy nodded. "Are you the remote to one of those-"

" 'Cause you're turnin' me on," finished George. He heard Nina's quiet snicker behind him. He elbowed her softly and looked at his brothers in pure horror.

"It is unethical to say that your older brother is turning you on." Percy said. Nina nodded and added, "It's incest."

"You know that muggle fast food place, McDonald's?" Fred continued, ignoring Percy and Nina.

"Is you're face from there 'cause I'm loving it." George said.

"Are you Irish? 'Cause I bet I can-"

"Shamrock your world."

"Are you Vietnamese? 'Cause I'm crazy-"

"Pho you. Are you Greek? 'Cause-"

"Olive how you're looking right now."

Nina and Percy tried interjecting but the two continued. "You remind me of hairspray. Tall-"

"Slim-"

"And keeping me hard all day long." The two said together. Percy's blush had faded but now it was back and burning more than ever. He glared at his brothers as the staircase stopped. Percy took hold of Nina's hand and tugged her up to the portrait of the Fat Lady.

"Fortuna Major," muttered Percy, ignoring the moaning calls of his name from his brother's. Whoa they totally don't mind committing incest. Nina thought. I'm tellin' ya Perce a lot of people fancy you.

Percy rolled his eyes and ignored that._ You still wanna have that sleepover here in the common room?_

_No duh!_

_We'll change and meet he-_

His thought was cut off by Ron and Harry running up to him. The two were pushing each other. In their haste to make it to Percy first, they ran into him. They ended up in a tangle of limbs on the floor. Nina watched the three with amusement. She helped Percy up as Ron and Harry wrestled on the floor. Percy's glasses were knocked askew. He huffed and smoothed out the wrinkle in his robes. Nina pulled up Harry and Ron, making sure they were at a distance so they couldn't claw at each other.

"What is the meaning of this?" Percy snapped at the two first years. The two instantly stopped trying to claw each other at the sound of Percy's voice.

"Hey Percy do you like toothpaste?" asked Ron. Before Percy could reply Ron spoke again. " 'Cause we were mint to be together."

I guess Ron commits to incest too. Nina thought. Percy rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time that evening.

"Percy did you know beautiful has 'u' in it?" asked Harry. Nina smiled at that pick up line.

Ron coughed. "I think your giving me asthma 'cause you take my breath away."

"You're like a warm cup of milk, hot and legendairy."

"You know I could never work in a muggle jeans shop 'cause I always make jeans go south." Percy sputtered at his younger brother saying that.

"I got a feeling we could have the time of our lives 'cause you're humps make me wanna rock that body so if you meet me halfway I'll give you that boom boom pow."

Percy almost fainted at that. He was shocked with the fact that people were actually trying to pick him up. Nina smiled and waved off Harry and Ron.

"Come on it's past curfew," She said. "Time for bed."

Ron and Harry obliged hesitantly. They argued on the way upstairs. Nina helped Percy up to the boys side of dormitories. She looked at Percy and pouted.

"Guess I'm not getting my sleepover huh?" She teased lightly. "You're 'bout to pass out Perce."

She led him into his shared dorm with Oliver, who suspiciously wasn't in bed. She was tempted to go out patrolling for the Gryffindor Keeper. Instead of collapsing on his bed and falling asleep he pulled off his blanket. She watched as he walked over to the door. He leaned against the frame and looked over at her. He tilted his head out the door and gave a weak smile. She smiled and shook her head. She followed Percy out of the boys dormitories and down to the common room. It was winter and no amount of blankets could keep them warm. It was like a blizzard outside. Percy and Nina sat in front of the fireplace with their backs resting against the couch. They had the blanket wrapped around them to keep them warm. Percy stared at the fire and Nina lolled her head back, her eyes closed. The two were joined at the hip, no room for anyone to squeeze between them. With a wave of his wand their clothes had changed into their pajama's.

"Hey Nina," said Percy. Nina lazily turned her head to the side. She hummed in reply.

"Are you a strawberry?" He asked her. Nina opened her light brown eyes to meet his piercing blue ones. She shook her head with an amused smile on her lips. "You must be, 'cause you're looking berry sweet."

Nina giggled and closed her eyes again. "The day I hear you trying to pick me up." She mumbled.

"You know I'm not just teasing." Percy said in a low voice, not wanting to be too loud.

"Oh? So you're just feeling random?"

He didn't reply. He leaned down and pressed a soft chaste kiss on Nina's lips. She opened her eyes slowly and lazily smiled. She leaned her head on Percy's shoulder and kissed his jaw.

"Sleep prince." She mumbled.

"Night princess." He said and pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

**-Morning-  
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"No fair Nina!" Five voices whined. Percy opened his eyes to see Harry, Ron, Fred, George, and Oliver glaring at Nina. Nina wasn't intimidated though. She smiled and brushed her bangs out of her face.

"Pissed he fancies me and I fancy 'im back?" She teased.

"You're a downright cheater!" They all complained.

"I didn't use any pick up lines." She said. "He won me over with his own pick up line."

The five turned to look at Percy. "What'd he use?"

" 'Are you a strawberry? You must be, 'cause you're berry sweet.' " She quoted Percy from last night. Percy blushed at the memory and wrapped his arm around Nina's waist. She leaned over and pressed a kiss to Percy's lips. Her tongue swiped across his lip and he forgot the others were there. He pulled her closer and slid his tongue into her inviting mouth. Their tongues danced together passionately. They snogged for a good ten minutes before they needed air. Nina smiled and rested her head on Percy's shoulder.

"Bloody cheater." Fred mumbled and pouted.


End file.
